The person you really need to marry Tracy McMillan TEDxOlympicBlvdWomen

When I was growing up, there was this song we used to sing on the playground, and it went like this, quot;Tracy and so and so, sitting in a tree, kissing, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes baby in a baby carriage.quot; And I’m like, quot;OK, that’s it! That’s how you do life. That’s how you do a relationship. Love, marriage, baby carriage. OK, got it!.

(Laughter) Then I grew up, and this is what my life turned out to be. (Laughter) Slightly more complicated, right? (Laughter) Love, marriage, divorce, dry spells, love, marriage, coparenting, another marriage, another divorce; you got the picture. (Laughter).

(Applause) So if you’re good at math andor a fast reader, what you’ve got there is that I’ve been married three times. Yep, three, and divorced. What that is supposed to mean is that I’m a total failure at relationships. And that is one way to look at it, but not the only way. Because what I think really happened is that I kept marrying the wrong person. No, it’s not that I didn’t it’s not that I chose bad guys.

My first two husbands were amazing men who are now married to wonderful women who aren’t me. (Laughter) And my third husband, well, we’re friends on Facebook now. So, all is well that ends well, right? After the collapse of my third marriage in 2005, I realized that I’ve been marrying everyone in sight, except the one person that I really needed to marry.

In order to have a great relationship and that once I married that person, all of my relationships would be successes, even the failures. The socalled failures, actually. Since we’re talking today about women inventing, I’m going to talk about inventing relationships. What I’ve found through a lot of trial and obviously, many, many, many errors, to be the thing that has transformed my life and love,.

And that is this idea of marrying yourself. So what does it mean to marry yourself? It’s a big idea. It is as big as marriage itself except, if I could just summarize it, it would be that you enter into a relationship with yourself and then you put a ring on it. (Laughter) In other words, you commit to yourself fully.

And then you build a relationship with yourself to the point where you realize that you’re whole right now, that there is no man, woman, job, circumstance that can happen to you that is going to make you more whole because you already are. And this changes your life. By now, I’m sure at least some of you are wondering why you should be listening to a threetime divorcee talk about marriage?.

How to stop screwing yourself over Mel Robbins TEDxSF

Bigger welcome! Hello, San Francisco! TEDx – oh my God, blinding light! Hi, everybody! How are you? (Audience cheering) Fine?! Oh my gosh! Okay, so. My name is Mel Robbins, and for the last seventeen years, I have done nothing but help people get everything that they want. Within reason! My husband’s here. So, I’ve done it in the courtroom, in the boardroom, in the bedroom,.

In people’s living room, whatever room you want to be in, if I’m there, I will help you get whatever you want by any means necessary. For the last three years – I host a syndicated radio show. Five days a week, I go live in forty cities and I talk to men and women across America who feel stuck. Do you know that a third of Americans feel dissatisfied with their lives right now? That is a hundred million people! That’s insane!.

And I’ve come face to face with it in this new show that I’m doing, which is also insane, it’s called quot;Inlawsquot;. I move in with families across America – (Laughter) You guessed it! – who are at war with their inlaws. We move them into the same house, I verbally assassinate everybody, we open up Pandora’s box, and I get people to stop arguing about the donuts.

And who is hosting Thanksgiving dinner, and talk about the real stuff. And that’s what I want to talk to you about. I’m here for you. I’m going to tell you everything I know in less than eighteen minutes about how to get what you want. So I want you to take a millisecond right now and think about what you want.

You! And I want you to be selfish. Screw Simon and the quot;Wequot; thing. This is about me, right now! (Laughter) (Applause) Sorry, Simon. What do you want? And here’s the deal. I don’t want it to sound good to other people. Being healthy will not get your ass on a treadmill. Losing your manboobs, so you can hook up with somebody,.

Now that’s motivation. (Laughter) So, I want to know: What do you want? Do you want to lose weight? Do you want to triple your income? Do you want to start a nonprofit? Do you want to find love? What is it? Get it, right here. You know what it is, don’t analyze it to death, just pick something. That’s part of the problem. You won’t pick. So, we’re going to be talking about how you get what you want.

And frankly, getting what you want is simple. But notice I didn’t say it was easy. It’s very simple. In fact, if you think about it, we live in the most amazing moment in time. So that thing that you have up here, whatever it may be, you want to use healthy eating to cure your diabetes, you want to figure out how to take care of the elders.

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