How Darwin Can Save Your Marriage
We are designed by evolution to be titillated by erotic novelty, males and females. Given that evolutionary design, it's completely predictable that 10 years of the same thing, whether it's the same music or the same food or the same sex partner, is going to lead to resentment, discomfort, whatever. It'92s going to lead to a diminishment of passion, certainly. So we start with that and then we add to that the notion that we're taught that that shouldn't happen, that if it does happen there's something wrong with you or something wrong with your relationship.'a0.
And so people aren't expecting that to happen, and so they interpret that diminishment of passion as a failure. The point that we're trying to get across in the book is that it's not your fault. It's not your partner's fault. It's the fault of the clash between the sort of animal we are and the sort of society we've designed. And as long as there's that conflict between our biology and our societies, there are going to be these problems. So a harm reduction approach might make a lot more sense than this sort of absolutist approach that a lot of people take where any.
Infidelity, any, you know, my husband looks at porn, that means he doesn't love me anymore. I mean, these sorts of responses to very natural behaviors cause a lot more problems than they solve, I think. I think if marriage is going to survive as an institution, it's going to certainly have to continue adapting to the realities of human nature as opposed to trying to shoehorn human nature into some predetermined shape. The point of marriage is that you want to get old with someone. You want to share your life with someone. Maybe you want to raise children with someone. You want.
To have a certain stability and trust that you couldn't possibly get with shortterm relationships. That's the point of marriage. And by imposing this expectation of sexual exclusivity for 40, 50, 60 years, we're cutting ourselves off from those really important things for something that's essentially trivial. Sex really isn't really that important. It's not that big a deal. And by making it such a big deal, we sabotage things that really are important, these primary relationships.'a0 We have children going through divorces, victimized by the psychological trauma of divorce, over what.
Over what That mommy or daddy had sex with someone else Who cares The problem is, much like the war on drugs, the problem is that we take this absolutist approach to something that people are always going to do. People are always going to smoke marijuana. People are always going to drink alcohol and coffee and whatever. But we make these arbitrary judgments on what's acceptable and what isn'92t, that have nothing to do with the actual harm that anything of these things could cause to people. So we throw people in prison for, you know, growing a marijuana plant on their windowsill.
It makes no sense it causes much more harm than just letting people do what they want to do. And really, whose business is it if a couple decides that they're going to, you know, allow a little casual sexual behavior on the side, especially if, as Dan Savage argues, and I agree, it takes the pressure off the relationship. If the door's open a little bit, you don't feel trapped. It doesn't mean the door has to be swung wide open, but, you know, the fact that it's open a little bit doesn't mean that the.
5 ways the Wine Dine Music Cruise Saved my marriage Flying Dutchmen Travel
Susan.you will never believe this i'm on a cruise! the last vacation Alex and I took was our honeymoon years ago. Remember our wedding song I talked him into taking the Wine and Dine and music cruise and let me tell you. It's the best thing we could have ever done. They have a Wine tasting every day! AND Every night a bottle of wine is delivered right to to our room and the food is amazing. He went gambling with him, and I got him to take a yoga class with me. It was incredibly.
Bonding. When I first bought these tickets, what sold me was the wine. But I am surprised by the music There's a concert every night! Like Kenny Loggins and Don Felder formerly of the Eagles and get this Three Dog Night They played Celebrate, the song we danced to at our wedding. There was even a special Jam session and Alex was able to pick up a guitar and show off his moves. We met some amazing people you'd get a kick out of them. Susan, It was the best investment we could have made for ourselves. It is like we are.
Florida Premarital Online Course Save $32.50 on your marriage license!
Welcome to the Florida Marriage Prep Course. My name is Dr. Tabitha Johnson I am a relationship expert, author, and speaker, and licensed marriage and family therapist in Florida. First of all, let me just take a minute to say congrats on your recent engagement and upcoming wedding It's such an exciting time and I'm so excited that you decide to look into premarital counseling. This is a tutorialbased program it's interactive and it's designed to help you get ready for marriage. We are licensed in all 67 counties in Florida,.
So that means when you complete this course, you can get a discount on your marriage license, currently it's $32.50 We know you're planning a wedding every dollar counts! And so this is a great way not only for you to save money but for you to get ready for the marriage and a lifelong journey ahead. So let me tell you a little bit about this as well. Not only does this give you a discount, but this also waives the threeday waiting period that means you can actually go get your marriage certificate.
And go get married all on the same day. Now let me tell you a little bit about what this program will do for you. We know that 50 all first marriages end in divorce 50 percent! I don't want you to be one of those statistics. And here's the thing there's so much research that says if that you just learn some basic skills about relationships, that can be totally preventable! That's what you're going to learn in this course. Let me tell you a little bit about how we're different. First of all,.
Our course is tutorialbased you get to watch some short tutorial clips and it gives you a lot of flexibility you can sign in, do a little bit and sign back out and come back at a different time. If you're maybe in a long distance relationship, you can use the same login, watch those tutorials at separate times, and then come back later complete the assignments together. Also, not all course providers that you're going to find online are actually experts in the field at marriage and family. Let me assure you,.
I've spent years and years of time in my education and research focusing on couple relationships and specifically on marriage. Also our program is researchbased. We didn't just throw a lot of content together, we spent time using a program that is researched based and has years and years of research to back up how successful it is at helping couples. Within this course, you're going to watch a short tutorial clips, and then you'll do some activities and assignments with your partner. You can log out, log in, and return at anytime.
As soon as you complete the course, you can download your certificate of completion. That's what you're going to take to the clerk of courts office for your discount. You don't have to wait on our office you just print that right at your computer. Now let me tell you, there are a few counties in Florida that require an original certificate that means we have to mail that to you, so just be sure to check out our website to see if you're county is one of those. I'm so excited be part of this journey with you.
Bible study will not save you
The world is besotted, chasing after knowledge. People believe that knowledge is power and that is why believers go after Bible knowledge. They think that Bible knowledge will give them eternal life. Bible knowledge does not help you to get into the kingdom of heaven. IT IS NOT WHAT YOU KNOW, IT IS WHOM YOU KNOW and WHO KNOWS YOU. Many people think that if they have qualifications they will get a high powered job and then they only find out later IT DEPENDS ON WHO KNOWS YOU. That determines whether you get.
The job or not. In the kingdom of Heaven it depends on whether Jesus Christ knows you, because He will say to many people in that day Go away I never knew you. They will sayLord we preached, we had churches, we did many things in Your name. And He will sayGo away I never knew you. You workers of wickedness. The question is DOES JESUS CHRIST KNOW YOU AND DOES HE KNOW ME If Jesus does not know us there is no way that we will enter into the kingdom of Heaven. You don't get to know.
Jesus through Bible study. You get to know Him when you fall on your knees and you seek Him with all your heart, and He will reveal Himself to you. If you know Jesus you will fear Him, you will respect Him and you will obey Him. You will SIN NO MORE. You will seek more and more of Him, more and more of His revelation in your life. You will want to be sure every moment, that Jesus is still pleased with you. Do you know Jesus Christ and does Jesus know you His sheep listen to His voice and they.
Key Peele Text Message Confusion Uncensored
BEEN TRYING TO REACH OUT TO YOU ALL DAY. ARE WE ON FOR TONIGHT sighs JEEZ. WHAT YOU CAN'T CATCH ME. YOU CAN'T CATCH ME. I'M LANCE MOORE. TOUCHDOWN, BITCH. WHAT PAUSE. phone chimes OH, SHOOT. KEEGAN'S BEEN TEXTING ME. SORRY, DUDE, MISSED YOUR TEXTS. I ASSUMED WE'D MEET AT THE BAR. WHATEVER. I DON'T CARE. phone chimes SORRY, DUDE, MISSED YOUR TEXTS. I ASSUMED WE'D MEET AT THE BAR. WHATEVER. I DON'T CARE. WHATEVER. I DON'T CARE WHAT THE FUCK IS HIS PROBLEM DO YOU EVEN WANT TO HANG OUT.
DO YOU EVEN WANT TO HANG OUT OH, THAT'S CONSIDERATE. LIKE I SAID, WHATEVER. LIKE I SAID, WHATEVER FUCK THIS GUY. JESUS, YOU. ARE FUCKING PRICELESS. AWW. YOU'RE THE. ONE WHO'S FUCKING PRICELESS THIS M THIS MOTHERFUCKER HERE. OH, HE WANTS TO OKAY, MMHMM. MMHMM. OKAY. YOU WANT TO GO. RIGHT NOW HMM. GUESS I COULD DO THAT. clears throat OKAY. OKAY, LET'S GO HE SAID OKA OKAY, LET'S GO ALL RIGHT, YOU KNOW WHAT YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANT TO REALLY. DO THIS NOW KEEGAN, YOU NUT.
YOU'RE NOT PUTTING ME OUT. FUCK YEAH, LET'S DO IT OH, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! FIRST ROUND'S MINE. OH, NO! OH, NO! THERE AIN'T GONNA BE NO ROUNDS, ASSHOLE! IT'S GONNA BE A FUCKING STREET FIGHT! THIS SON OF A 'CAUSE TONIGHT WE GONNA PARTY AND THE PARTY DON'T STOP YOU! BUDDY! LIKE I SAID, FIRST ROUND'S MINE. A BEER AND A GIMLET FOR MY PARTNER RIGHT WHAT'S THAT UH, II GOT YOU A BASEBALL BAT WITH NAILS IN IT. FOR MY POSTAPOCALYPTIC JACKIE ROBINSON COSTUME.
Go and Sin No More
MUSIC PLAYING Ye have heard that it hath been said, An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth but I say unto you, That ye resist not evil but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek MAN'S VOICE YELLING WOMAN CRYING Adulteress! Bring her in. Bring her in. INAUDIBLE. Bring her in. Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act. Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned but what sayest thou WOMAN CRYING What sayest thou He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a.
Key Peele Auction Block
ALL RIGHT, Y'ALL GATHER ROUND. GATHER ROUND. WELCOME, GENTLEMEN. WHAT A BEAUTIFUL AND BLESSED DAY FOR AN AUCTION. ALL RIGHT, Y'ALL, GET ON UP THERE. PUT THAT WHIP DOWN AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS, THOUGH. STRAIGHT UP. I DON'T CARE WHAT PLANTATION I END UP ON. I'M STRAIGHT STAGING A REVOLT IN THIS MOTHERbleep. HELLS YEAH. WE HAVE LOT A, LOT B, AND LOT C. UH, $3 ON LOT A. $4. 5! $5 GOING ONCE, TWICE, THREE TIMES, SOLD. LOT A GOES TO THE MAN IN THE BLACK HAT.
I MEAN, GOOD. YEAH. chuckles I'M GLAD I DIDN'T GET SOLD, 'CAUSE I DON'T WANT TO BE OWNED BY ANOTHER HUMAN BEING. WHOEVER BUYS ME, THEY BETTER KILL ME THE FIRST DAY, OR I'MA GO BUCKWILD ON THE WHOLE OPERATION. OKAAY NEXT ONE, GET UP ON UP THERE, NOW. OH, THISOKAY. both inhale $6 ON LOT A. $7! EIGHT. 9! $9 GOING ONCE, TWICE, THREE TIMES, SOLD! both exhale OKAY, WELL, YOU HAVE TO BUY THAT DUDE. IT'S A NOBRAINER. I MEAN, THAT GUY'S HUGE.
A MASSIVE INDIVIDUAL. THAT'S TWO OF ME. ANYBODY WOULD BUY HIM. I'D BUY THAT DUDE. MY QUESTION IS HOW'D THEY CATCH HIM NEXT! OKAY. OH, YEAH. YEAH. $2 ON LOT A. $2 GOING ONCE, TWICE, THREE TIMES, SOLD. SEE, NOW, THAT SURPRISES ME. THAT IS INTERESTING, TO SAY THE LEAST. I MEAN, WELL, IT JUST SEEMS LIKE AT A CERTAIN POINT, IT'S LIKE, DO THEY EVEN KNOW WHAT THEY'RE LOOKING FOR IT'S LIKE THE WHOLE CRITERIA SEEMS JUST A LITTLE INCONSISTENT.
I MEAN, AT SOME POINT, I WANT TO BE ON LOT A. YEAH, WHICH CAN A BROTHA GET ON LOT A NEXT. OH, HERE WE GO. HERE WE GO. BEEN A PLEASURE. GIVE 'EM HELL. ALL RIGHT. OKAY. $8 ON LOT A. GOING ONCE, TWICE, THREE TIMES, SOLD! HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN NOPE, NOT TRUE. HOW DOES IT HAPPEN WHAT YOU JUST SAID THAT'S GOBBLEDYGOOK. OKAY THAT CAN'T BE TRUE. 'CAUSE WHAT CAN THIS DUDE DO.
LOOK AT HIM. WHAT COULD HE PICK A COTTON PLANT IS, LIKE, THIS TALL. YES. I'M SAY NO OFFENSE, BROTHA, I'M JUST SAYING. OFFENSE TAKEN. WHAgasps AM I WRONG IS HE NOT SHORT HE'S SHORT. BUT YOU ARE ACTUALLY SHORT IN REAL LIFE, IN THE WORLD. YOU'RE GOOD, MAN. ENOUGH. I WILL NOT HAVE MY REPUTATION TAINTED, SELLIN' SUPERFICIAL, BIGOTED SLAVES. SUPERFICIAL DID THAT REALLY JUST COME OUT OF YOUR MOUTH THAT'S IT! THIS AUCTION'S OVER! AUCTION'S OVER WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.
NO, IT'SIT AIN'T OVER. IT'S NOT OVER! I'M STRONG, Y'ALL! I'M VERY STR I CAN SLEEP IN A BUCKET. I'M FAST, I GOT STAMINA, AND I KNOW MAGIC. MY WORST QUALITY IS THAT I'M A PERFECTIONIST. LET ME MEN HAVE I MENTIONED THIS DOCILE. I AM AGREEABLE TO A FAULT. YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN THE DUDE WHO ASKED ME TO GET ON THE BOAT WHEN WE CAME OVER HERE. NOT A VIOLENT BONE IN MY BODY. I JUST WALKED RIGHT ON, NO BIG DEAL. NEVER SEEN A BOAT IN MY LIFE.
Love and Marriage Husband and Wife Relationship Advice
Hi I'M Dr. John Lund author of How to Hug a Porcupine. The problem is never that people don't love each other folks it's not about that. When people get divorced it wasn't because there wasn't a time when they didn't love each other. It was their inability to resolve their conflicts in healthy ways. That was the heart and core of 99.999 percent of all those relationships that either terminate or if they stay together they stay together in a roommate kind of a capacity not really emotionally married or committed but nevertheless.
In the relationship. Now how do we avoid that How can we stay connected Well we are talking about criticism and I had mentioned that the way my wife wants to be approached is to have me write it down and then I give it to her, she processes it and gets back to me. There are only one of three responses. One, I thought about what you are going to say I want you to know that I have thought about it and I am going to make this change.
Another is, I hear your criticism I have read it, I've thought about it and I think you need some more information from me because I don t think you have the complete picture here. Or thirdly, Listen I thought about it and I ain't going to change no matter what so you better learn to live with it. Well that certainly is another alternative right Well and those are the three reactions. Now the way I want to be approached is I want to know on a scale of one to ten either a two or a nine as to how painful it is going.
To be and then secondly if it's a nine I need time to prepare myself and I have said to my wife that, Honey you can give me a little time to prepare and I promise to get back to you in the next two or three hours We have a limit of about three hours and so unless you are on a plain or some other foreign circumstance that wouldn't be conducive to that but other than that other than that what I am talking about is I will get.
Back to her and then I sit and then she gives me the criticism what ever it may be and my first response is to listen, the first response. Now the reason I'm talking this threw with you very carefully is that we need to develop replacement skills, that is that whatever you learned growing up in your own family and your interaction in the family that you were raised in if it's not functional if it's not working if it's not leading for the two of you getting closer together and helping you become your highest best selves,.
Than we have to replace that behavior with another behavior. And the behavior I am talking about right now is criticism and we need to learn to give that criticism and there is an art to doing it. So with my wife for example when she says, I have got a 9! Then I get myself ready, I sit there I listen to her and this is the replacement skill I say. Okay to whatever the criticism was. I repeat it back to her and then she confirms that, that indeed was what her concern was and now I know what it is. I can't always respond.
Instantly and so we have agreed that there will be a little period of time where I can think about and process that and I will get back to her. Now most of the issues that we are going to deal with in marriage or other relationships are not the child is playing in the freeway right now and you need 3 hours to get ready for this Most of the time we are going to be dealing with issues that we are upset about at the moment and probably the least capable of dealing with at that moment and so its really really wise to give.
Key Peele Gay Marriage Legalized
THE MOOD IS INFECTIOUS AND EXCITING TODAY AS PEOPLE FROM ALL WALKS OF LIFE CELEBRATE BECOMING THE SEVENTH STATE TO LEGALIZE GAY MARRIAGE. WE'RE HERE TALKING TO EXCITED COUPLES ABOUT HOW THEY FEEL ON THIS HISTORIC DAY. OH, HI. HI, HI. UH, YEAH, IT'S A VERY HISTORIC DAY FOR CIVIL RIGHTS. WHOO! AND FOR GAY AMERICANS. AND AMERICANS ALL OVER THE COUNTRY WHOO! WE'RE GONNA GET MARRIED! YEAH! WELL, YOU KNOW, WAIT screams WE SAID THAT IT WOULD BE A CONVERSATION, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN BECAUSE WE DIDN'T KNOW.
THIS WAS GONNA PASS SO DARN FAST. OH, MY GOD! SO ARE YOU GUYS A COUPLE laughs ARE WE A COUPLE COME ON, GIRL, LET'S GET SERIOUS. NO, IT'S JUST SO FAST. MY NAME IS LASHAWN. AND THIS IS RIGHT HERE IS MY SAMWICH. IT'S, UH, SAMUEL, YEAH. laughs AND WE'RE GONNA GET MARRIED! YEAH! THAT'S SO GREAT. HOW LONG HAVE YOU GUYS BEEN TOGETHER WELL, WE'VE BEEN THREE YEARS. IT'S BEEN FOREVER, WE'VE BEEN WAITING FOREVER! IT'S REALLY IMPORTANT TO KNOW THE PERSON.
WHO IS THE BRIDE I AM THE BRIDE. DODODODODODODO! laughs OH, WELL TELL US ALL ABOUT YOUR PLANS. YOU KNOW, WE NEVER THOUGHT IT WAS IMPORTANT TO HAVE A PIECE OF PAPER SO THERE'S NOT ANY PLANS OH, YEAH! PIECE OF PAPER! WE'RE GONNA GET THAT PIECE OF PAPER, SAMMY! YEAH, YEAH. THAT PIECE OF PAPER! WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU GUYS WILL GET MARRIED WELL YOU KNOW THERE'S A LOT OF HIDDEN COSTS IN A WEDDING OH, EVERYWHERE! WE'RE GONNA GET MARRIED OVER HERE.
AND OVER THERE AND IN THE SKY AND ON A CLOUD. OH, WOW, IT SOUNDS LIKE IT'S GONNA BE A BIG WEDDING. WELL, YOU KNOW IT'S JUST A CONVERSATION THAT WE HAVE GIRL, WE'RE GONNA RENT THE MOON AND FILL IT WITH ROSES! screams WE REALLY NEED TO TALK ABOUT WHETHER OR NOT WE THINK IT'S FAIR TO EVEN GET MARRIED WHEN IT'S STILL ILLEGAL IN SO MANY OTHER STATES OH, MY GOD! YOU SEE LOOK AT HIM! THAT'S MY MAN WITH HIS BIG HEART. I'M SORRY, MY HUSBAND. YOU MY HUSBAND NOW.
WELL, WE JUST YOU MY HUSBAND NOW, BITCH. OKAY, WE JUST DON'T WANNA RUSH INTO ANYTHING, BECAUSE STUFF GETS OVERTURNED. REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED IN CALIFORNIA. BABY I'M GONNA GET A 14KARAT RING THE SIZE OF 14 MOTHERbleep CARROTS. THAT'S WHAT'S UP, DOC! smacking lips WELL, YOU TWO CERTAINLY SEEM EXCITED. YEAH, DO WE SEEM EXCITED OH, YEAH, YEAH. OH, OKAY. CONGRATULATIONS. I HOPE YOU GUYS HAVE A WONDERFUL LIFE TOGETHER. WE JUSTWE REALLY JUST DIDN'T THINK IT WAS GONNA PASS. WE'RE GONNA HAVE A HOUSE THAT'S SHAPED LIKE A UNICORN.
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